Chinese new year wishes

Chinese new year is supposed to be a time filled with togetherness, reunion and love.
but this year's new year.. has been an awkward one. dampened mood.. the spirit just isn't there.
in its place.. troubles surfaced.. the distance has taken a toil on our relatinship with family and  relatives.
we stay so far from each other. our generations are so different. mindsets, thinking.. its just isn't the same anymore.
when i was little. staying up till 12 am, helping my dad to wrap red packets for my other cousins was such a big deal.
lying on the bed.. waiting for 12am. it was just so cool.the festive season and spirirt was overwhelming. but now?
sleeping at almost 2am everyday? 12 am is nothing.. on the contrary... sleeping at 12am has already seemed so early.
the result: sore throat and headache.
when i was little.. i was a shy little girl.. i didn't talk to my cousins a much as now.. maybe that's the only thing i look forward to? conversations with my cousin to remind me that i'm an adult now. but even now.. some of my cousins missed this event.. this annual gathering that we have.. once.. only once every year.
not even a photo was taken.. times have changed.. from 2 years ago..
i still recall that photo taken about 2 years ago.. when i still had long hair. there. on the mantelpiece. all framed. a  reminder. chinese new year. togetherness.
i'll always remember that awkward silence in the lift. away from the chattering and conversing during dinner.
silence
that defeaning silence. i wanted someone to do so much as a cough.. to just.. break it. but before i knew it.. we've reached the ground floor.
goodbye's exchange. meeting again next year.. or maybe during my cousin's wedding this year. or we'll never meet again..
its so unpredictable.. everything. i miss how it used to be.
the only thing now is that.. we're mutual friends on facebook. but that's all? the bond called family.. its been stretched.. till its become a fine line. it might just snap anytime. but i don't want it that way. i want to feel to togetherness all over again.
i hope next year, things would change.
sometimes i eould wonder about my friend's family.
how are they like? maybe i'm blessed that not many of my family memebers are going through a rocky time.. or plague much by illness.
but today.. i just uncovered.. some problems my relatives faced.. not going to say it here or anything.. we'll just watch and see i guess. sigh.. >.<

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anyways. enough of the sad and bad stuff. this year it was pretty much oki. steam boat and everything. at least i had fun entertaining my younger cousins. playing heart attack, uno, old maid and 0,1-9. it was hilarious to see my cousin mixing heart attack and 0,1-9 up. haha so 3 of us had to explain to her the diff. haha laughed really loudly. taking o lvls this year right?? all the best cousins!! haha

gran's gathering was oki too. except that dad took a diff route.. -.- then ended up on an 'adventure' it would be an enjoyable one if i didn't had to use to toilet so badly. :X haha but oki. arrived safely and everything. met nic's wife claris hehe :) adrian didn't bring his gf though.... >.< nvm haha hmm.. then ate and stuff. my cousin's daughter is really spoilt. sigh.. she ah... i feel like asking her to think before she do anything. but i cannot... cause she's like only 2 or 3? but still!! sigh.. nvm hopefully she'll mature faster and can spare a thought for her parents and grandparents. played dai tee haha but only won 2 rounds. claris was awesome!! she won like.... 6 out of the probably 10 rounds we played??!!! nic's wife is good. haha :P

went home i saw that i received this red packet with the words:'great grrand child' i'm like.. ah? i'm grand child not great grand child :X nevermind. haha got red packet can already :)

today went to other gran's house.. met my grandpa's brother's son.. and his family. sigh.. all young children. 16 and 11. :X i'm old!! then grandpa's church friend came too. yup took pics:) haha hmm.. that's about all i guess. back to work tmr..

throat feels weird.. >.< hopfully will get better tmr :)



Till then, happy chinese new year everyone!! tu nian xing da yun!! have a bunny hopping lunar new year! :)

=do something right=