don't know what's my problem. but nevermind. jia you oki girl!!!! you can do it. even if you do it with tears. really. you can do it!!!
sick.. again. oki. it's ibs. as usual. doctor says that its caused by stress. but its the holidays now.. what stress??
i sat down and thought about it. i finally gathered some thoughts. about my decision. i've told them to some people. yup. more or less it is about some deicisions. to my tsf mama: its one factor.. but not the only factor and not really a heavy factor so don't worry. it's my personal problem. i won't let you get involve. i told you that i'd protect you, i keep that promise.
i've sorted it out with myself. i really should just do what i can now to make my body feel better. yup. then regarding that situation, i still can take it. though its like my brain says one thing, my body feels another. its infuriating. i really need to recover fast. i can recover fast. i need to work harder, cause i really cannot let the void affect me. haha. but yes.. my hand was quivering when i wrote it.i was afraid tears would fall. so the words didn't turn out as nice as i hope it would be. but yeah.. still void... won't affect.
not sure how long. i keep saying that. >< bad habit. but from how i see it... its good. at least someone's happy :) so yeah. jia you clare go and make this world a happy place!!!
its easter sunday today, so it should be a happy day cause Christ rose again to save us!! yeah. thank God that i got my letter already. really. though i'm still waiting for another one... not sure if i'll get it. but yeah! have faith!!!
come on body, recover. don't let others to keep worrying for you. if you want to let it out then do it and then that's it. jia you!!!
The Only Exception
When I was younger, I saw my daddy cry
And curse at the wind
He broke his own heart and I watched
As he tried to reassemble it
And my momma swore that
She would never let herself forget
And that was the day that I promised
I'd never sing of love if it does not exist
But darling, you are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
Maybe I know, somewhere deep in my soul
That love never lasts
And we've got to find other ways to make it alone
Or keep a straight face
And I've always lived like this
Keeping a comfortable distance
And up until now I had sworn to myself that I'm content with loneliness
Because none of it was ever worth the risk
But you are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
I've got a tight grip on reality
But I can't let go of what's in front of me here
I know you're leaving in the morning when you wake up
Leave me with some kind of proof, it's not a dream, oh
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
And I'm on my way to believing
Oh, and I'm on my way to believing
i found out that i learnt this on the trip:
sometimes we try so hard to capture every single moment with a camera, when i actual fact, the best moments are the ones that your eyes capture. they stay in your memory the longest. when you close your eyes, the pictures.. the images.. the actions they flash by. so vividly. no matter how you try to stay away from them, they keep coming back.
gor told me that to cover old memories you have to make new ones. i've made many new memories. but maybe they are of a different genre. even though i got a feeling that some memories can never be covered, i have yet to try it out. maybe in the near future. i still need time,and strength. i've gotten courage. but i need those two weapons.
haha did something cool with gor :) hopefully i'll still remember it xD. hmm. mix feelings about it.. cause.. i don't want to lose.. but sometimes i got the 'i don't mind losing' mindset but. no!! i must stay firm. haha i'll not lose xD.
healthy mind healthy body. come on clare. PUSH YOURSELF!!!
=do something right=
2 brusies, 1 blister. diarrhoea for 4 days. haha i'm still alive even though i didn't let you know all these things.
i won't lose!
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